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  I blushed. “But you did.”

  “I did. I drank enough to impair my judgment, so I won’t be good. You should steer clear of me.”

  I gasped softly. “You didn’t text or call. You owe me.”

  “I do owe you. What would you like me to do?”

  My body heated dangerously. I had never felt like this. I angled my head in an attempt to get his lips to brush against my skin. What was wrong with me?

  Amber turned to find me, but one of the guys asked her a question, grabbing her attention. Oh God. He was giving Connor an opportunity with me. My stomach knotted. “Your friend just stopped Amber so she wouldn’t see what we’re doing.”

  “I know,” Connor admitted, letting my shirt go and falling a step behind. We arrived at the game area and it was loud and consuming. “First up, horse races with the water gun. Last one has to eat one whole cotton candy in five minutes,” Connor ordered.

  We each took a seat by a gun. Amber sat to my left and Connor sat to my right. He leaned toward me.

  “Good luck, my love.”

  A shiver ran down my spine.

  The carnie blew the horn and the race began. My adrenaline rushed and my heart rate increased. I tapped my feet as I squeezed my gun, aiming water into the tiny hole.

  The sound of a winner rings.

  “Ugh.”

  Connor stood and look for the last placed person. He pointed to his bald, tattooed friend. “Tate, prepare your mouth, buddy!”

  We laughed as his friends slapped him on the back. I checked to see who had won: Connor. He picked out a green bear and handed it to me. I hugged it close.

  “Awww, I’m so jealous. He even chose your favorite color,” Amber said, petting the head of the stuffed animal.

  I know.

  “Having fun yet, Amber?” Connor asked.

  “Yes, I am. You’re a cool dude, Mr. Tomlinson.”

  Connor laughed and walked towards the snack booth. He paid for a bag of cotton candy and handed his friend the bag. We huddled into a circle as his friend started to eat.

  “I’m timing you.” Teal shirt guy pointed to his watch.

  Tate stuffed his mouth with big puffs of cotton candy. We watched and laughed at his struggle. Connor took this moment to slide a hand into the back pocket of my jean shorts, the big teddy bear concealing everyone’s view of us.

  I sucked in a breath. I liked his hand there. If we were alone right now, I would pull him in for a kiss. I angled my behind to get closer to his hand.

  Connor moved his hand away.

  Tate finished the cotton candy. “Under three minute!”

  “I’m not surprised,” Connor’s friend with short dark curly hair muttered.

  “Another game or a ride?” Connor asked the group.

  “Ride, a scary one,” Amber suggested.

  “Ride it is.”

  Connor took us to a ride called the Zipper. “I’ll sit this one out. I’ll stay with Vida and her bear.”

  “Well played, Mr. Tomlinson,” I whispered.

  “I know.” He smiled.

  Amber winked at me before she left with all of Connor’s friends toward the line.

  Connor grabbed the bear from me and wrapped his strong arm around it, his other arm hooking around my shoulder.

  I lifted my hand and laced my fingers with his. “Are we not caring that someone from school will notice us?”

  “I hope not. It’s a school night.”

  “But—”

  “We’re riding the Ferris wheel, maybe more than once. We need to talk.”

  We walked quietly toward the Ferris wheel. Connor slid his arm off me, giving the attendant our tickets. I get into a car and he climbed in after me and sits next to me, leaving the bear in front of us.

  Connor took my hand in his. “I’ve wanted you for so long. I didn’t know what that feeling was when we first met. But seeing you again in class, I understand what it was all about,” he murmured, turning my hand in his. “If our circumstances were different, you’d be mine now.”

  “I’ve been yours. I’ve been yours since I was eight,” I stammered, knowing what was coming. “Don’t do this.”

  “There was an incident after class that I’ve been trying to clear up. Fortunately for me, the school believes me,” he cupped my chin, “but it made me realized I can’t continue this.”

  “What happened after class?” I asked, grabbing and clenching the end of my flannel, panicking.

  Elizabeth.

  “It’s nothing for you to worry about. I’m taking care of it.”

  “Tell me,” I urged gently.

  He brushed his thumb across my cheek. “I’m protecting you by not allowing you to be privy to what happened. V, I’ve always cared so much about you, your wellbeing … your happiness.” His eyes roamed over my face. “You deserve more than what I can give you.”

  “Don’t end us before we have a chance to start,” I whispered, deciding to seize the moment. Without another thought, I grabbed his face and kissed him deeply. All my emotions seeped into our kiss. He needed to know my heart belonged to him.

  It had always been his.

  He kissed me back, his fingers threading into my hair, his tongue delving into my mouth. His kiss was hungry and demanding, everything he’d been holding back, he showed me with this kiss.

  I want him.

  I want him.

  I want him.

  I needed him to know.

  I ended our kiss and pulled back, staring into eyes that smoldered with fire. I licked my lips, seizing the moment again. “I want you to be my first.”

  Connor’s mouth dropped then he sucked in his bottom lip, his eyes burning strong with desire. “Fuck,” he gasped.

  “We’ll be careful,” I pleaded, fisting his T-shirt into my palm and tugging him back to me. “And you owe me,” I said against his lips.

  He smiled. “I explained my—”

  “I don’t care. A promise is a promise. You owe me a night of passion.”

  “V… I can’t. Don’t do this.”

  My eyes fell with sadness as I moved away from him.

  “I want to plan and make the day special for you. Just give me time, okay?”

  Did I just hear that right? “You’re—”

  “I’m considering it, yes. Your wish will always be my command, but I have to be sure this is what you really want.”

  “It is,” I whispered.

  Our car stopped at the top, rocking back and forth. I reached for Connor, grabbing his arm at the very same moment he gripped my waist, his body tense. He was afraid of heights.

  I palmed the side of his head to calm him. “Kiss me and forget how high we are. Kiss me.”

  He grabbed my face with both hands and kissed me as I’d asked. I inhaled him, my arms wrapping around him.

  Nothing else mattered.

  In this perfect moment, it was just Connor and me.

  ***

  Connor held my waist as we walked back to the Zipper, my arms wrapped around the teddy bear. We’d been gone for longer than we’d anticipated and we’re greeted by a frowning Amber. She stood with her arms crossed, but when she noticed us, she ran over. Connor let me go.

  “Where did you guys go? You were supposed to stay right here!”

  “I’m sorry. We just got off the Ferris wheel. Did you have fun on the ride?”

  Amber’s face softened after hearing my explanation. “I had a blast. Mr. Tomlinson’s friends are fun and obnoxious, but I’m ready to go home. You ready? We don’t want to miss class again.”

  “Yes,” I answered. It was time to go home.

  Amber turned and waved goodbye to Connor’s friends.

  I looked at Connor. “See you tomorrow, Mr. Tomlinson.”

  As he stared back at me, his eyes flickered with fire. “See you tomorrow. Be good.”

  Amber turns back to us, smiling. “See you tomorrow, Mr. Tomlinson.”

  As we walked away, I turned back to catch one last glimps
e of him for the night. He lifted a hand to give me a small wave goodbye.

  I turned around, hugging my bear tighter.

  I’m going to miss you until tomorrow, Connor Tomlinson.

  Chapter 6

  A personal family matter. He’d be gone for the rest of the week...

  That was what the teacher who took Connor's spot told us when we’d arrived to class today. I immediately texted him after the news was delivered to us. No text back.

  I tried again after class. No response.

  "Is your dad back from his business trip?" Amber asked as we walked to our cars.

  "He should be home today."

  "Should we call Mr. Tomlinson? I hope he's okay."

  "I think we should. I'm worried about him,” I said honesty, hoping he’d pick up her call.

  We stopped walking as Amber dialed his number. Seconds had passed before she shook her head.

  "It went to voicemail."

  “Oh.”

  "I'll call you if he calls me back. Are you heading home?"

  "No, going to the community college to study.” And wait for Connor to call back.

  “Have fun studying. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  We hugged each other goodbye.

  ***

  There was an upstairs corner section in the college library that I’d adopted as my studying nook. I’d sit on the floor with my back pressed against the wall, my knees up and book resting on my lap. I'd study like this for hours, sometimes until it was closing time. No one ever went to that particular section except on rare occasions.

  And one of those rare occasions was happening now...

  I saw the top of Connor's blond hair peeking above the books on the shelves. I stopped in surprised and blinked to make sure I wasn't seeing things.

  He was there.

  I took small steps, rounding the corner of the aisle. He stood with his hands in his pants pockets, browsing the books in front of him. He was dressed extremely preppy today: navy blue vest with a baby blue and white checkered dress shirt underneath and khakis. He looked so young and youthful.

  And so handsome.

  He heard me moving and turned his head toward me and smiled. I opened my mouth to ask why he was here, but he stopped me with a kiss, a kiss that topped all his other kisses. He kissed me until I trembled, grasping to hold on to him.

  He spun me around and pinned me to the wall. I wrapped my legs around him as his kiss deepened. I was no longer a seventeen-year-old kid. I was a desirable woman.

  My heart pounded in my chest as Connor pressed between my legs, rubbing himself against me. I started to sweat. I wasn’t ready for this. I pressed a hand to his chest to stop him. He stopped kissing me right away, gentle setting me back on my feet. I was still pressed against the wall, Connor’s hand beside my face. He closed his eyes in pain, lips sucked in and pressed into a hard line.

  “I’m sorry, V. I had to … I had to know if you were truly ready for what you asked of me. I didn’t mean to scare you. I got carried away.”

  The tears trickled rapidly. “I’m not ready …”

  “Baby, I know.” He captured me in his arms, hands in my hair, comforting me.

  “Wait for me,” I whispered into his chest. “Don’t leave me again.”

  “I won’t. I won’t ever leave you,” he promised. Connor held me until his limbs turned numb. He lets me go and chuckled. “I’ve never held someone so long that my arms gave out.”

  I stretched my arms and wrapped them back around him. “I’ll hold on for the both of us.”

  He chuckled again.

  “What’s going on at home?” I asked in a soft voice.

  "Everything is fine now. I got your text. I'm sorry I wasn't able to text you back."

  "We were worried sick about you."

  "I know … I called Amber back and she told me I’d find you here."

  "Everything is really fine now? You promise?”

  "Everything is fine."

  “Okay." I squeeze him.

  He crushed my head back to his chest and held me for several more minutes before asking, "What are we studying?"

  “History," I muffled into his chest, sticking out my bottom lip.

  He chuckled and rubbed his hand down my body. "I can feel your pout. I take it history isn't your favorite subject?"

  "It's boring."

  "I'll make it fun."

  "I dare you too."

  He laughed again. "After tonight, you’ll never look at history the same way."

  I kissed his chest. "Because from now on when I think of history, I'll think of you."

  “Yes … and also from my mad tutoring skills." He released me and sat on the carpet, leaving his legs splayed. He pulled me down and I sat between his legs, my back pressed against his chest. He took my history book out of my bag and placed it on my lap. "We'll read together and I'll explain anything you don’t understand."

  I lifted my knees and leaned back as I opened the book to the chapter I needed to study. I tucked my hair behind my ear and started to read. Connor kissed the back of my neck, causing me to pause as he discovered another sensitive spot on my body.

  “Mmmm…” I rubbed my palms down his thighs.

  “You’re so beautiful and you’re mine,” Connor whispered.

  Yes, I am yours. Always.

  Chapter 7

  Five days.

  Five long days since our time at the library.

  That was how long it had been since I’d last seen Connor, and that was how long it had been since he’d called or texted.

  He’d asked me not to worry, to give him time to take care of some personal matter. The days would fly by, he’d told me. I didn’t believe him, but I’d reluctantly agreed.

  Today was Monday, so he should be back teaching our class. I danced my way into the kitchen to grab breakfast. My dad was at the stove frying eggs. There was pancake mix all over the counter and dirty bowls filled the sinks.

  “Welcome home, Dad,” I muttered.

  Eight days. That was how long my dad had been gone this time.

  “Good morning, my sweetheart.” He finished up the eggs and scooped them onto a plate.

  "Do you have time to have breakfast with me?"

  "I don't," I said honestly, grabbing the doorknob to leave. I have a teacher to make out with.

  “Just ten minutes, please. I haven't seen you and I'm leaving tonight for another week."

  My hand dropped. Again? "If I asked you again to quit your profession and go back to the corporate world, would you? We don't have a lot of time left together. In less than a year, I'm leaving for college."

  "You're going to college, not leaving forever. I'll see you during your breaks,” he reminded me.

  "I'm asking for you to be here for me more. When I lost mom, I lost you too." My voice cracked as a single tear dropped.

  My dad placed the plate in his hand on the white granite with a clank and rushed to me, pulling me in for a hug. In his embrace, I could pretend that all was right in my world. There were no secrets or pain. I was safe…

  "I'll cancel my trip."

  "How much is your client paying you for the week?" I asked in a shaky voice.

  "Ten thousand."

  I pulled away and stared at my dad, astonished. “Wow … women will pay that much for sex?"

  “They pay that much for my company. Sex is a bonus … for both parties."

  "I see … And these women, why do they do it?"

  "I don't get into the reasons why they do what they do.” He paused, deep in thought. “Sit. I'm feeding you while I tell you about a client I don’t see anymore, but she was very special to me. I want you to understand that not all my clients are what society perceives them to be."

  I sat. Connor would have to wait. This.This right here was huge. Dad was finally showing me a glimpse into his world.

  He scooted the plate of food toward me before getting himself his plate. I started to eat and looked expectantly at him as he sat
down. He took a couple of bites before speaking.

  “Leah was ..." He rasped her name, refusing to look me in the eye. “Well, you've met her. Do you remember?”

  I dropped my fork, the sound vibrating through the room as it hit the table and fell to the floor. Connor's mom. Leah was Connor’s mom.

  My dad quickly bent down and reached around my chair to retrieve my fork for me. "Five second rule.” He winked.

  In a daze, I took the fork back.

  “When Leah first contacted me, it was four years after her husband had left. That bastard left a note on her nightstand while she was still sleeping, letting her know he was leaving her and never returning. He was the sole provider, so life was hard for Leah and her son. She had no one to turn to, and after the ordeal she’d had to endure, she chose not to bring another man into her life. But, of course, she still craved the touch of a man. Her desire hadn’t died, so she contacted me.”

  “Wow.” Anger simmered for Connor’s dad as my heart ached for Connor’s mom.

  "I never thought another woman could affect me the way your mom did.” He took a deep breath. “She was fierce and so damn passionate about everything.” His gaze dropped and his body shagged, his heartbreak showing all over him.

  “Dad, I understand now,” I said, placing my hand on top of his. “You were mourning mom when you got into your business and now you’re mourning Leah.”

  Until he found love again, my dad would never stop.

  “I’m only going to continue until you are done with school, then your dad will travel the world and cross off your mom’s bucket list … something I promised I would do for her.”

  “I want to go with you to some of the places, her most favorite ones.” I smiled with tears in my eye. “Dad, go on your trip and have the best time of your life. But before you go, you are dressing up in costume and having a scary movie marathon with me while we pass out candy on Halloween, deal?”

  “I’ll leave that day clear on my calendar.” He grinned.

  I scoffed down my breakfast. “Dad, I gotta go. See you next week.” I bent down and hugged his shoulders, resting my head on the top of his.

  “Love you, baby. Be good.”

  “I will.” I kissed the top of his head before I walked to the door.

  The next time I saw Connor, I would hug him harder and longer than I’d ever hugged him before.