The Dirty Anthology Page 7
For the first time, I honestly hope Lexi isn’t a virgin. I’m not going to be able to be gentle with her once I’m in her.
She reaches into the bag. Her brow scrunches when she pulls out the wooden box in it. She turns it around and her eyes widen when she spots the necklace hanging inside, right in front of the Harry Potter logo etched into the small mirror.
Her shocked eyes lock on mine. “Drew,” she gasps.
Don’t fucking touch her.
I clench my fists harder.
“You got me a time turner?” Her low, tender tone makes her voice sound even sexier.
And makes me feel like I’m the most accomplished motherfucker walking the Earth.
See? Told you. It’s my job to put that happy little look on her face and her reaction right now just proved it.
I barely stop myself from puffing out my chest like some cocky loser. “Well, it was either that, or Hermoine’s wand,” I tell her. “And I saw it hanging out of your bag the other day. So . . . knew you had it.”
Lexi opens the box with shaking hands and brings the necklace out. The chain glints in the light. I made sure to get her a custom-made, gold version of the necklace. No way I was getting her the fake shit.
“How did you know I love Harry Potter? Just because you saw the wand?” She doesn’t look up at me, eyes still glued on the necklace in her hand.
Which is fine by me, like that she can’t see the look on my face when I answer, “No. It’s because I pay attention to you. A lot of it.”
Our eyes lock again.
“Drew . . . “ She stops and swallows heavily.
What does that look in her eyes mean? Damn it, what?
“Thank you so much.”
I open my mouth to respond—
Lexi leans forward and presses a kiss right against the corner of my lips.
8
My uncle clearing his throat rips the memory from me. I feel the loss of it so acutely that I want to push him into the wall for taking it from me.
He didn’t actually take it from me. It’s still there, etched into every piece of my mind, lurking. As always. All I need to do is turn my attention to it, just a little, and I’ll be overcome again. Transported right back to that night.
I can’t. My uncle is standing in front of a set of large doors that lead into the main lab of the applied sciences division; a branch of our IT department.
However, we strictly develope hardware in this part of the department, something only a select few people know right now. We’re planning on taking the market by storm.
That explains the need for the handprint and retinal scanner next to the doors.
“ ‘Drew?” My uncle waves at the scanner. He doesn’t bother to ask the question that I once again see in his eyes: Are you alright?
I step up to the scanner and place my hand on it, then bend slightly to let it scan my eye next. My uncle has the same level of clearance I have—absolute—but he wants me to get used to doing all this by myself.
Not that small shit like this is difficult, but it was never my intention to take over this company—that is, until the day I realized it’d be the perfect revenge against my father—and I’d made that very clear to everybody after I lost Lexi.
My uncle prides himself on being a better father figure to me than my father was.
He is. Always has been. That’s why I let him have his fatherly moments where he gets to show me around and “teach” me everything I need to know.
The doors unlock and we walk inside. I haven’t been here in a while and I’m impressed with the set-up now that it’s all done. This entire part of the division was completed in less than eight months. Considering the scope and size of it all, and the sheer amount of equipment in here, it’s a huge feat.
My uncle nods toward a group of men standing in front of a large LCD.
I follow him over to them, taking in the image on the screen. Python coding stares back at me—one of the main languages in software development.
I don’t have enough time to read through all of it but I’m pretty sure the group of men we’re approaching are the ones heading the Providence project.
Sure enough. We stop in front of the work station facing the LCD and I spot the large black goggles on top of it.
Rumors leaked late last year that Menahan had begun making their own version of the Oculus Rift, the video gaming goggles currently being developed. The Oculus Rift goggles will allow gamers to virtually step into the worlds of the games they play and visually experience them as if they’re inside it.
Menahan, that little bastard, has no interest in the gaming world. He’s into informational theft. He disguises it by presenting his “innovations” to the public as regular security software advancements.
But we all know what his clients truly hire him for.
My uncle and I are also very aware who one of Menahan’s main targets is going to be.
Us.
That scumbag has a personal vendetta against us.
Against me.
That’s okay, though. I have an ever bigger one against him.
He’s one of the people that hurt Lexi.
He has no fucking idea what’s coming to him.
My uncle makes quick work of introducing me to the group of men surrounding the Providence goggles; mainly, Paul Rundlett, the man leading the entire project. “Paul here is working directly with the head of our IT department. He left Menahan when she left and came to us alongside her.”
Paul smiles at me, his blue eyes lighting up at the mention of the new head of IT. “I’d follow that girl anywhere and she knows it. Berkman is a bloody genius and working alongside her is a pleasure.”
A name. One that isn’t even that unique. He could’ve been talking about anyone.
Don’t ask me how I knew he wasn’t. I just did.
My veins go ice cold.
My focus becomes engaged on him and only him.
I’m probably staring at him like a goddamned lunatic but I don’t care. “What was that name again?”
Paul blinks. “Uh . . . Berkman? She’s the main developer on the Providence software now. Did you get a chance to meet Lexi yet?”
The world spins dangerously. I stagger back, feeling like I’ve just been hit.
And that’s when I catch sight of my uncle’s wide eyes and the expression on his face.
9
I’ve been hit many times in my life. Mentally. Emotionally. I’m no stranger to pain in all its myriad forms, have experienced every level of it from a measly one to a devastating ten.
Lexi’s lips linger on my skin for a second longer than they should, the corner of her mouth pressed intimately to the corner of mine.
I hear her surprised inhale when she realizes what she’s done. She moves to pull away and it hits me: I’ve never felt this kind of agony before. Nothing’s ever come close.
She can’t take this away from me.
I won’t let her.
My hand snaps around the back of her neck, stopping her. Her face is mere inches from my own. So beautiful that I just want to nuzzle it.
Later. First, I need those lips back on my skin.
“Andrew?” She stares into my eyes, curious.
I see the hunger in her eyes, the one that almost matches my own.
It’s enough. A start. I’ll make her burn as much as I do by the time I’m through with her.
I lean in and brush the tip of my nose across hers. “I need your lips, Lexi.” She will never know how much.
“A—Andrew . . . we shouldn’t.”
She’s so fucking right.
I pluck the necklace out of her hand and blindly dump it back into the gift bag. “Tell me you don’t want me to kiss you,” I say, staring right into her eyes.
Those glasses she’s wearing look so sexy on her.
Somehow, she’s keeping them on while I do her. No matter how rough it gets.
Her hands wrap around my shoulders. “I . . . can’t s
ay that.”
Exactly the answer I expected.
The one I wanted.
God help us both.
“Baby, I’m going to kiss you,” I breathe against her lips.
Her last warning. This is her last chance to say no.
Her eyes slide closed.
Groaning, I fit my lips to hers. My entire body jerks at the first, silky contact.
It’s like I waited my entire fucking life to feel those lips. Fuck. How did I ever live without this girl’s mouth?
I don’t press for more, leaving our lips meshed together, taking every breath that leaves her into myself. My blood has never pounded so brutally through my veins; my dick has never been this hard.
I want her tongue more than I want my next breath, but I won’t be able to handle feeling it. Not without pinning her beneath me and taking everything she has to give.
Lexi shudders and my body responds with a shudder of its own.
I give her bottom lip one more peck and move back, ending our kiss. I can’t go further. Too many things are roaring in my head. Things I need from her that can’t happen right now.
She grabs onto my neck, my jaw, bringing me back to her mouth.
Holy shit. I can’t resist this.
Her tongue slips inside.
A moan is torn from me, my self-control along with it. I cup her face, my tongue playing wetly with hers.
Lexi. This is fucking Lexi kissing me, and when a small moan leaves her, my entire body reaches a breaking point.
I have to stop kissing her. If I don’t, I’m going to fuck her. Right here. I don’t even know how far she’s gone.
I haven’t taken her on a date yet.
She deserves so much better than to be fucked on a couch in the office of a gym.
Lexi latches onto my bottom lip, sucking on it repeatedly. Soothing it with her tongue. Like it’s her little play thing.
My pulse explodes everywhere inside me.
“Lexi . . . fuck. Wait,” I whisper, too out of breath to speak any louder.
She lets me end our kiss and sits there, panting—eyes heavy-lidded, cheeks pinks, lips swollen from my kisses.
Oh God. My fucking cock hurts so bad. I want her hands on it. Now.
Suddenly, she gasps, a horrified expression taking over her face. Her hand flies up, fingertips pressing to the lips I just kissed. “Shit. What did I just do? God. I’m sorry. Why’d I do that? You have a girlfriend!” She shoots off the couch.
10
I jump up after her.
Lexi paces across the small office space. “Stupid. I’m so stupid. Why would I do something like that?”
I grab her shoulders. “Listen to me. Stop blaming yourself. I kissed you.”
“Why did you?”
That’s a question I definitely shouldn’t answer. Not here. Not under these circumstances.
I have no choice. Her big eyes remain on mine, waiting for an answer, and they’re both curious and vulnerable.
Us guys? We play with girls. That’s what we do. Girls hate us for it, but most are so desperate to have us in their lives that they let us get away with anything. With women being so willing to forgive us, why should we change?
This isn’t the first time I’ve cheated on Kaylee. Hell, no. She knows I have, too. Oh, she was furious when she found out, but she came chasing after me when I tried to end it.
But Lexi . . . if she was my girl, I wouldn’t play with her, cheat on her.
Shit. I really wouldn’t. The thought of hurting her in any way makes me sick.
God help me. I think I love this girl.
Shaken by that revelation—and feeling absolutely fucking stupid because I’m just admitting this now—I cup her face.
Fuck. I hope she can’t tell that my hands are trembling.
“I . . . “ Have no idea what to tell her without divulging what it is that I really feel for her. Too soon for that. At the very least though, I can go with some honesty. I don’t like the idea of her thinking I’m just playing with her. “I like you, Lexi. Have for a while. When I felt your lips . . . I just couldn’t stop myself.”
Her eyes soften momentarily.
My thumbs twitch on her cheeks, aching to smooth over her skin.
But I won’t take more. I refuse. There’s things that have to be straightened out first before I can have her mouth again.
A fact that’s driven home with her next statement.
“You have a girlfriend.” She moves to step back.
Away from me.
I drop my hands to her shoulders, shaking my head. “I’m only with her because my father wanted it.”
Her expression darkens at the mention of my father.
I don’t blame her. “I’m leaving her. I even told my father. He knows it’s you I want.”
At that, her face goes pale. “Andrew, your father hates my family.”
My father has no real reason to hate her family—but he’s always been good at deluding himself like that. He’s fucked you over? Easy fix. All he has to do is convince himself that you somehow deserved what you got. It’s all your fault. He’s just the victim lashing out in the name of retaliation.
He’ll go after Lexi and her mother if I get in the way of his plans to unite our family with Kaylee’s. That’s what Lexi’s afraid of. She doesn’t have to say it out loud; I thought it, too.
I drop my hands to grab hers. “I know, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have told him why I’m leaving Kaylee. I just—forget it.” Pressing my lips together, I stop myself before I can go further, realizing how pointless this is right now.
Until I’m officially single, I can’t be completely honest with Lexi. It wouldn’t be fair to her.
But she doesn’t let it go.
I kind of expected she wouldn’t.
“You just what, Andrew?”
She hasn’t pulled her hands out of mine, letting me rub my thumbs into her skin, and I take comfort in that.
“Andrew?”
I sigh, giving in. There’s no way I can resist telling her the truth. At least part of it. “All I could think about was being single so I could ask you on a date.”
She arches her eyebrow, making me smile. “Just to ask me on a date?”
My smile widens. “To start.”
Her eyes flicker all over my face, pausing at my mouth.
“And when I start dating you, Lexi, I’m not fucking hiding you from anybody.”
Her juicy lips part and my cock throbs painfully for them.
Soon, I’ll have those lips all over my naked body. Wrapped around the swollen tip of my dick.
I throb in my jeans again at the thought, my tip slick against my briefs. Tightening my hands around hers, I breathe through the rush of desire, reminding myself that I’m doing the right thing by waiting.
I’ve never waited for a girl. Never had to. This shit is already proving to be harder than I thought it was going to be. I’ve never done “right” by a girl. I want to with her. The reminder is the only thing that keeps me steady.
She wiggles her fingers, signaling that she wants me to let her hands go. I do, but it takes a shitload more effort than is normal. Smoothing her hands across my shoulders, Lexi steps closer, looking up at me with those sexy, open, vulnerable eyes that somehow scream at me to do her.
My body shoots tights with tension.
“Are you serious right now? Or are you just playing with me?” she asks softly.
I growl under my breath, angry that she would even think I’d do her like that. “Lexi, I want you to listen to me and listen well.” Pinching her chin, I make her stare into my eyes. “I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want you. And I’m damn well prepared to do anything I have to do to have you.”
11
I expected her to react to that comment a million different ways. With disbelief. Anger. Maybe even fear.
Imagine my shock when she steps even closer, pressing every inch of her body against mine.
Heat f
lares everywhere. Inside my body. Outside it. In the air that crackles with pure electricity around us.
Her thin arms come around my neck and she lays her head on my chest, right above my raging heartbeat. Snuggling into me, she gives me the sweetest hug I’ve ever been given.
There’s nothing sexual about this hug—well, unless you count the fact that I’m hard as freaking steel, and her abs are pressed right against my cock.
I hear what might’ve been her surprised gasp, but she doesn’t pull away. No. She snuggles into me again, her head tucked under my chin in the most adorable way. I wrap my arms around her, returning her hug.
She gives me a happy little sigh.
God, she makes my fucking chest ache.
I duck my head and press my nose to her hair, inhaling her scent.
Her arms tighten around me. “Thank you for the gift, Drew. I love it.”
There are no words. A simple “you’re welcome” won’t suffice. The necklace is such a small thing, incomparable to all the things I want to give her, but I’m glad it’s made her happy.
I’ve spent years of my life watching those big eyes sadden from afar. Knowing my asshole of a father was largely responsible.
Lexi tilts her head back, letting me see her eyes, shining exactly like I need them to—happily. Her hands slide down, smoothing over the gray t-shirt I’m wearing. An innocent move on her part, I know this.
My skin flares, my cock growing hard again, every cell responding to that touch.
I want to fuck. I want to come.
With her.
Thrusting into her savagely, her wet tight pussy squeezing the come right out of me, the scent of all that wetness so deep in me that it’ll become all I can smell and taste.
Jesus.
I don’t even want to try with any other girl. My mind is fixated on how fucking amazing it’d be to have her.
Knowing that I can’t aggravates the hell out of me. I will, someday, but until that day comes, I need to keep my distance. Being this close to her is too much of a tease.